love

Give A Little Love

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100_5605Give a little love, do something nice and spread some cheer every chance you get. 

Like ripples on the water everything thing we do creates an effect on our environment and the people around us.  Yesterday I was feeling rather blue and had several friends that were kind by calling to say they were thinking about me, or texting me to cheer me up.  One of them helped me to see things in a different light as he often does.

It’s important to surround yourself with people who are interested in learning about you and who you are.  People that share some of the same interests, have opposing opinions and aren’t afraid to share them, and people who are just fun to be around.  We all really need a variety of friends to spend time with and keep us on our toes, to offer our support and encouragement, and to share with and learn from.

I have a couple of Eeyore type personality friends that have a sarcastic sense of humor and a realist outlook that borders on gloom, but they are good-natured and I love hearing from them. 

I am thankful for the people in my life.  We are all here to work together and help each other along the way.  Each of us have our unique gifts and talents that make us who we are.  It’s such a thrill to meet someone new and have the time to get to know them.

Cherry Coley (c)

Related articles

Puppy Love

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There’s no better example of unconditional love that a dog.  Whether you’ve been gone for 5 hours or 5 minutes they are still happy and excited to see you.

Comet

Dogs come in all shapes and sizes just like people.  There’s a little puppy for everyone who wants to add a member to their family.

A loyal heart filled with hope and love.  Handle with care.

Fishing In The Park

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photo by Casey Keal

It’s interesting how we age in this life.  Our body’s age every day, but our souls, our minds grow according to what we put in them, what we feed them.  I am so thankful for memories and how our minds store information.

I remember being about 5-6 years old, warm spring days, and dad making us all get up really early to go fishing.  I don’t remember the park where we went; just that it was a stocked pond.  We each had a bamboo fishing pole with a bucket of worms for bait.  I hated putting the worm on the hook, I felt so bad about hooking the poor thing.  My dad would walk over and put it on for me half the time because I would take so long.

We would always park then walk over to a part of the bank of the pond with a big tree.  It was nice on those warm spring days to stand or sit under the tree by the water.  It didn’t really matter that we weren’t expert fishermen.  There were a few times we caught little trout, but we just looked at them then let them go. 

 I remember my brother taking a big swing with his fishing rod, swinging the line way out, hooking dad’s hat and sending it flying out towards the water.  Mom would stand by the bank and laugh and get a little frustrated over not actually catching any fish.

On those banks I heard stories of how mom used to fish with her sister and brother for their dinner.  Sometimes they would eat fish for breakfast too, though mostly they ate flapjacks and biscuits. 

It’s funny how sometimes those days seem so distant that they can barely be remembered, but now and then I see a large sprawling tree standing by a pond and I remember the laughter while we tried to learn to fish.

I remember the squish of the mud between my toes when I took off my shoes.  How I loved to look in the water and watch the minnows playing around the wispy grass and moss on the rocks close to the shoreline.  I even remember the smell of the water, the warm air, listening to the birds sing and feeling the sun shining down through the branches. 

I remember being tired at the end of the day, folding up the lawn chairs, putting the cooler in the back of the station wagon then crawling in the back on top of a blanket and falling asleep on the way home. 

I loved those days spent with my family.  You might think that kids don’t remember, but I do, and even on days when things seem so rushed and hectic, there are times when I look back on childhood memories and I’m thankful for the moments spent in the sun in a time that wasn’t so rushed.

Cherry Coley ©

You are Important!

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Don’t you hate it when you are in the middle of a conversation and suddenly you get lost?  The person talking is emotional and the subject is important, but somehow some where they changed subjects or switched things a little in the middle of their talk and you are struggling to get back on track and figure out what they are talking about. 

Don’t panic, it happens sometimes to the best of us, especially if it’s someone with a different personality than yours.   What to do?  Don’t just let them go on with their story and stay lost hoping they will say something that brings you back into the conversation, gently stop and ask for clarification.

It’s important in good communication that you follow what the other person is saying are understand what they need you to understand.  I have been one that would allow the conversation to go on thinking I understood, then come to find out later that I really didn’t.

After looking at the different relationships in my life, I realize that in order to cultivate them and have more fulfilling friendships and deeper relationships with my family and the people I love that it’s more important for me to ask questions than to just assume anything at all. 

I wonder now at some of the relationships in my past.  Would things have turned out differently if we had communicated better?  I don’t know.  Perhaps, in some cases, we would have realized we didn’t have much in common earlier. 

The important thing to remember is that communication is vital to all relationships.  Take the time to share, watch facial expressions, make eye contact and really listen to what’s being said.  Show the people in your life that you appreciate, respect them and that they are important to you.

Cherry Coley ©

Grief and Birthdays

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If there is one thing I have come to realize the last few weeks it’s that grief is completely unpredictable, and that it will not be ignored.  You will not skip by it, you will not just put it off until later, you will get doubled over and knocked down, and then struggle to keep some sort of composure as you muddle through the day.

 I have just been sort of going through the motions the last few days, putting one foot in front of the other and acting like everything is fine.  It’s not fine; it doesn’t seem real at all.  At least 4-5 times I started up the road and thought, “I have to call mom,” then would remember that she’s not there to call.  Then my mind would do this weird flip flop of trying to reject that fact and act like it was all just a bad dream.  If only we lived in soap opera land that might be true.  Then again, I’m not one to stand around plotting and worrying all day. 

 Somehow I just didn’t plan for this rollercoaster, and feel like I should have seen it coming, I should have anticipated or something.  You see, my birthday is tomorrow.  It’s never been that big of a deal for any of us.  We don’t go way out of the way, or celebrate for weeks or a month, or anything like that.  I am not really sure why, we just never have. 

 Yet, every year my mom would call me at 5 minutes until 5 o’clock and say, “Well, it’s about time you woke up!  (insert year)’s ago you kept me up all night long waiting for you to get here!  Happy Birthday!”  Then later on we would meet up and she would have made a cake and have written out a card.  It didn’t hit me until this weekend that I wouldn’t hear that message that used to make me smile and roll my eyes at the same time. 

 This last Saturday, my oldest daughter went to her Senior Prom.  She was simply beautiful, so very grown up looking in her dress with her boyfriend by her side.  I had to work so I wasn’t sure I would get to see them before they went to Prom, but they waited and made a special trip to come back by the house so I could snap a few pictures.  It was a bittersweet moment, I am so amazed at how much she’s matured and has really grown into a wonderful person, I was nailed again thinking how my parents would have loved to see her all dressed up.

 My youngest daughter went to a friend’s house to stay so it was just me, the dog, the cat and boxes of stuff to go through.  I was at a really low moment on Saturday, and just let myself cry for a while, talking to my mom as is she was there with me in the room.  At one point I asked, “Why, Mom, Why did you leave?  Why aren’t you here now?”    It was then I looked in the drawer of a cabinet, and found an envelope. 

 I turned the envelope over and pulled out a birthday card from my mom.  There was no date on it, but I know it must’ve been one from the last few years.  There she had written “Happy Birthday, Cherry.  If wishes were dollars, we’d both be rich.  I have so many wonderful wishes for you, and in the end, it’s the thoughts and wishes that count the most anyway.  Love, Mom”

 Thanks, Mom, you have NO idea how much I needed that!  Then again, maybe you do.

 Cherry Coley ©

 

Unfinished Treasure

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My mom was crocheting a tablecloth.  It was a project she started about two years ago or so.  She had crocheted a tablecloth for my brother and his wife and asked if I wanted one.   I said yes, but not the same pattern.

The pattern we chose was called Cathedral Window.  She kept telling me over and over through all the time she was working on it that she didn’t think she would live to see it finished.  She had a terrible time with gout and arthritis, but she worked on it whenever she could.  I told her if it was too hard, then don’t worry, but she wouldn’t hear of it, she was determined.

Truthfully, I think it was finished, but she loved the pattern and the challenge, so she kept on working on it.  So, technically she was right, because she was in the middle of a row and so it wasn’t really finished when she passed away.  I am unsure what to do with it.  Should I try to finish it?  Should I leave it as it is and put it in a display case?  Should I have the last row removed and a border put around it to complete it?  I just don’t know.

I love it, but it makes me sad because it was on her lap, she had been working on it when she left us.  For now I am going to gently pack it and preserve it for when I can look at it with a clear thought process and perhaps a heart a little more healed before I decide what to do.

I miss you, Mom.