Burning Bowl Ceremony – Make a Positive Change!

The Inspiring Blogger Award

I posted this article a few years ago.  It is a great way to start out the New Year.  Let’s make 2015 a better year  with a positive outlook!

Someone asked me about burning bowl rituals the other day, what they were and what the purpose is.

I actually love burning bowl rituals.  What a great way to let go of things that are bothering or hindering us.  It’s a great way to clear negative thoughts and energy and make way for a new, positive start.  What better time than the start of a New Year!

I started doing burning bowl rituals at a young age, though it wasn’t initially with a bowl, just a candle.  It’s really quiet simple and something that is generic to any belief system according to how you make it.  I liked the idea of something I didn’t need in my life anymore burning and going up in smoke.

 Find a bowl preferably metal or glass (you don’t have to have one, but it makes it nice and neater), fill it up a third of the way with rock salt or salt, and stand a white candle in the middle.

 Simply take two sheets of paper – on one sheet write all the things like bad habits you want to get rid of, excuses for things you haven’t done, weaknesses, temptations, things that are bothering you or you would like to be gone in your life; including negative ways of talking to yourself, or beating yourself up for things that go wrong.

 On the second sheet of paper write down all the things you want to take place of the things you are getting rid of in your life.  If you are getting rid of negative ways of talking to yourself, then write that you will find daily affirmations that will work for you.  If you often beat yourself up when something goes wrong, write that you will celebrate when things go right.   Once you have this list written, fold it and put it in an envelope and attach it to a month on your calendar – say December since that is the end of the year.

 There is no right or wrong way to do this, it is totally up to you what you are making a point of letting go of in your life whether it be emotions or specific things.  Take some time to really contemplate this, then either roll the paper, or tear it into pieces and feed it to the flame and let the paper burn out on the salt by the candle.   (NEVER leave a candle unattended).

 As the paper is burning see and visualize the things you wrote down going up in smoke, take a moment to meditate and say a prayer of gratitude and forgiveness.  Recognize that you are letting go of the things that are clogging your creativity and holding you back from who you want to be, and where you want to be.  Choose to be thankful that these things no longer have a place in your life and you are making a point of letting them go and deciding on another direction right now.  It can be as elaborate or as simple as you want to make it.

 Have fun releasing all the bad things and things that just seem to linger and never really do any good.  Feel the stress go up in smoke, when the air clears breathe in the fresh new start. Remember to write down and set your goals, take small steps to reach them each day.

Later in the year, check your calendar and in the month that you attached the other envelope or reminder – take out the other list and see how successful you were at implementing the changes you wanted in your life.  The important thing is to move forward.  You will be pleasantly surprised how small acts of faith can make things happen.

 Cherry Coley ©

A New Beginning

IMG_0100Here, at the end of 2014, there is a chance to begin again.  We make our own decisions, create our own opportunities, and our own obstacles.  We decide whether to begin again, or to keep going down the same path and in the same direction.  Sometimes a break, a time to stop and get our bearings is necessary.  A time to reflect and sort through the events and actions that brought us to the place we are now.  Taking a break, a time of reflection, is beneficial and important to assess the situation before deciding which way to proceed.  Just don’t take too long a break or you will find yourself becoming complacent and settling for less than you want or intend.

Major life changes such as losing a loved one, losing a job, ending a relationship, changing residence, or making a career change can leave us feeling lost and uncertain.  It is at those moments it’s important to remember the things we’ve already come through.  Life offers a variety of challenges along the way.  Our ability to navigate and survive is directly related to our perspective, our attitude, our wits, and our faith.   However, we are not meant to survive this world alone.  We were designed to socialize and interact with others.  Choosing our friends wisely is important.

Why not make plans this year to get out of your comfort zone? Why not make 2015 the year you reach for more in yourself and expand your horizons?  Do something you’ve never tried before, like painting, or learning to play the guitar, or learning to drive a motorcycle.  Why not extend a hand of friendship to someone new and see what happens along the way?

In just a few days we will be saying goodbye to 2014 forever.  It’s important to remember that not only does the year-end, but time passes, moments pass and they can never be regained once they are gone.  So stop rushing about and wasting precious time.  Think about your days, hours, minutes and how you are spending that time.  What can you do different this year?  What actions can you take starting now to make a difference in where you are compared to where you want to be?  Don’t settle. Don’t fumble your way through and go with the flow.  Instead make your steps and actions deliberate and take charge of your own path.  Set goals that are reasonable and attainable, then plan the steps to reach those goals and set up a time line.  Most important find a buddy to work on your goals with you.  We all need a helping hand at some point, someone to encourage us and to hold us accountable.  Reaching goals is easier with a buddy to offer a little push to keep going and to keep us from beating ourselves up if we get off track.

Let’s say goodbye to 2014 on a positive note and look forward to 2015!

Cherry Coley (c)

Spring Forward

clock    It’s time to move the clock forward again.  We watch the sunrise many times on the way to work in the morning now.  Bright hues of orange  and yellow streak the sky as the sun comes up and signals the start of another day.

I love this time of year.  Even though I like winter with the cold and snow blanketing things in white and adding an icy coat to the trees and streets, I love it when spring comes bringing sunshine and warmth to wake up the sleeping trees and plants.

I look forward to Spring this year.  It’s a time for renewal, a new beginning.  A perfect time to start writing again.

I welcome this new phase in life.  This year is proving to be more challenging in some ways and more fulfilling in others.  Each year we live is filled with different experiences and opportunities waiting to be taken advantage of if we have the courage to step forward and the willingness to try.  I am thankful there are new things to learn.

So tonight, don’t forget to set the clock forward.  Take advantage of the longer daylight hours to come.  Time is a precious resource, once it’s spent you cannot replace it or relive it.  Spend your time wisely.

Cherry Coley

Journaling A Past Time, A Legacy, A way to stay Sane!

journalsJournals, blank books, are one of my favorite things to get as a gift, to buy at the store, and to give to a fellow journal writer.

They have so many different journals to choose from now.  There are leather bound journals, silk bound journals, painted journals, journals with flowers, dragons, landscapes, designs, and just about anything you can think of.

There are big journals, small journals. pocket sized journals, journals with lines and without.  There are journals with questions to help you think of what to write, to write down your memories, or dreams.  I love journals.

This year has been really hard.  I have felt quiet lost at times, missing my parents so much it hurt.  I fell into a deep depression for a time.  It took awhile and a lot of effort to get back up out of the darkness that was threatening to swallow me up.  My journals helped to save me.  I could write whatever I wanted and not worry I would offend or upset anyone.

For the first year after my parents died I kept a journal where I wrote letters to my mom everyday, sometimes several times a day.  I had been so close to her, I was used to talking to her everyday, and it was a way for me to keep talking to her, to gradually accept that she was gone, but would never be forgotten.

I shared many things in my journal written to her.  I told her a lot of the things I wish I had had the time to tell her when she was here.  I apologized for some stupid mistakes.  I shared some new experiences with her.  Then as the year drew to a close and my journal was almost full, I realized it was time to let go.  I was okay with that.  My journal had allowed me to hold her close for awhile longer as I grieved.

There’s not a day when I don’t still miss my parents and wish I could talk to them, but I’m better prepared to face a future now, and I know that they are somehow watching over me.

If you’ve never tried writing in a journal then I encourage you to give it a try.  Keep it safe, keep it private.  Unless, you are journaling with a friend or spouse where you each take a turn writing a page. Free your mind – learn to journal, try it, you might like it.

Cherry Coley (c)

Side note*  there is an App for smartphones called “Momento”  it is a daily journal.  You can even set a reminder and it will ask you – “how was your day?”  It’s a great way to start keeping track of your memories and the moments in your life.

Fall is Here

cherrys iphone 031October is my favorite month.  The cooler temperatures, the fall decorations and pumpkins all around.  I love the smell of pumpkin spice and cranberry candles.

I love the fall decorations, and the change in the air.  Although, I love Halloween, the dressing up, the fun and games, the spooky stories, roasting marshmallows and drinking hot cocoa by the fire.

We are having cooler temperatures here already.  I love that too.  It also means that my favorite holiday will be here soon.  Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday.  It’s a time of family, friends and togetherness.  A time to get together and enjoy each others company and good food.

I love fall.

Cherry Coley (c)

 

Comfort From A Furry Friend

Lindsey Keal

Lindsey Keal

Today our black cat reminded me how comforting the presence of an animal is.  I had asthma as a child and spent many hours in bed with a vaporizer.  My cat Mitten (who I was not allergic to) would cuddle up with me and purr.

Many nights I went to sleep to the comforting sound of singing and purring of my cat.  Batman, our black cat, reminded me this morning how comforting that sound can be.  It brought back warm memories of long ago when the sound calmed me, comforted and helped me breath at a slower rhythm.

Animals add so many wonderful things to our lives.  They add entertainment and companionship, acceptance and unquestioning love.  I thankful for the furry family members I’ve known over the years, they’ve added their share of smiles and tears to my memories and will never be forgotten

Cherry Coley (c).

Books Books and more Books!

booksI love books.  They are one of the greatest gifts we have! Wonderful tomes filled with fantasy, recipes, life experiences, and information to entertain, feed our bodies and minds, encourage our spirits and expand our knowledge.

What an amazing ability and opportunity we have to learn to read.  It is right up there at the top of the list of my things I am thankful for!  Probably second would be the ability to write and type.

I read constantly. I don’t believe in information overload.  There’s no such thing.  Our brains expand as needed!  You can fill it every day and it won’t run out of room or memory like your computer will.  Amazing!

Since I read a variety of books on a steady basis I am going to start a friendly book review.  I have come across some pretty wonderful books along the way and I can’t think of a better way to show appreciation than to review them honestly and give some verbal applause and kudos to those who put in the effort to share knowledge.

What have you written lately?  A letter? A recipe? An encouraging email? Kindness expressed is never wasted.

Cherry Coley (c)

Challenges Are Not Permanent

cherrys iphone 182This year started out kind of rocky and wound up being one big challenge after another. Yet, I am still here and I am grateful for the things we have.

In the midst of struggle we sometimes forget to be thankful.  Things could always be worse.  Life can find ways to be challenging that you never thought of.

I am thankful for my health.  Though there have been struggles the last few months, it is just part of life and the experiences we go through.

On my birthday this year I was feeling a bit blue. I had been missing my parents and feeling alone.  Then when I was driving up a busy side street by our house I saw a big, white, fluffy puppy.  I worried that he might get ran over.  I pulled the car over and called to him, he came running up to me and I put him in my car.  We cruised around, looking for signs and put up some of our own, but no one seemed to be looking for him.

pic by Cherry

pic by Cherry

This little became my birthday present and I named him Scout.  I THOUGHT he was a white husky.  I was wrong, he is a white husky mixed with a great Pyrenees.  He is a sweet and gentle giant in the making.

It amazes me, when life can seem so bleak how one or two things can change and bring joy.

One thing is sure, life will change.  Circumstances will change.  Some things will be challenging and others will be enjoyable.  Take the time to experience life fully.  These moments are yours, the experiences are yours and they only come once.

Scout has grown and is now 8 months old.  Lord, he is a BIG boy and still growing.

cherrys iphone 315

Scout isn’t the only change in our family.

There is another significant change coming in January. She is going to be beautiful just like her mommy.  I look forward to being a grandma!

 

Casey's baby girl

Casey’s baby girl

Cherry Coley (c)

Set Your Targets Closer and Set Your Sights High!

cherrys iphone 247Have you ever set your heart on a career or goal and then lost your focus?  Distractions and life events you didn’t have control over cropped up as obstacles and you had to put off what you were working on, or maybe you just put it aside hoping someday you might get back to your dream.  I have.  I remember dreaming of doing things, working hard to set goals and lists, then becoming discouraged because there were too many other things I was responsible for at the time and it seemed my dreams would always get shoved aside.

Here are some things you can do to stay motivated and keep making progress towards your dreams.

  • *        Focus on the outcome instead of the activities.

It’s easy to fill up a “to do” list with a lot of activities that seem necessary and valuable when we write them down, but are they?  If you aren’t careful what seemed like a good idea and vitally important can get confused with “busy work” and before you know it you’ll find yourself with a big to do list that you aren’t getting done, a feeling of despair because you aren’t making the progress you thought you would, and sometimes thoughts of giving up because you become discouraged, or feel overwhelmed with the distractions and events.

When you focus on the outcome instead of the activities – put up reminders of where you want to be.  Don’t do a big to do list, instead just focus on what you want for an outcome.  You will surprise yourself finding ways to fit in the things that must be done to get you to your goal.  What’s more is you may come to realize things you thought were important are just busy work and aren’t necessary to get you where you want to go.

Resources you didn’t see before will come into focus because you aren’t worried about the “to do list” – you’re looking for your end result.  When you keep your focus on the outcome it sets your brain and eyes in motion to look for opportunities that you might’ve otherwise missed.

  •     Set your targets closer

Another way to stay motivated is to set your targets closer.  When you want to gain self-confidence it helps to set some easily obtainable goals, once you reach your target – celebrate!!  Every success counts!  Get used to that feeling of celebration when you reach your goal, stop and enjoy it!  Build on your successes and keep the momentum going!  You can do it!

It seems silly to remind to celebrate, but how many times do you reach a goal and think, “okay, that’s done, now what?” and just move on to the next thing?  I was doing this a lot.  Where is the enjoyment? Where’s the lasting sense of accomplishment?  Well, gee, I just bypassed it and went on to the next thing.  It’s important to celebrate the little successes, it will make the big successes that much more sweet! Life is a joy to live and we need to celebrate when we reach a milestone or goal.

  •     Surround yourself with people who will hold you accountable and encourage you.

Notice I didn’t say – surround yourself with people who will beat you up and try to whip you into getting things done.  This may work for some, and I confess now and then I kick myself into gear, but put me with someone who’s going to belittle or make me feel bad for not reaching a goal on time and it has the opposite effect on me.  Eventually I may even start avoiding that person.  Who wants to talk to someone whose intent on judging you?  I’d rather find someone who will listen to my concerns and offer some encouragement and helpful suggestions.

Just keep that ant philosophy.  Ants don’t get distracted or let obstacles get in their way.  They just keep on going, up, down, around, under and through whatever gets in their way to reach their goal.  When they need help they send for reinforcements and get the job done.

Cherry Coley ©

Get a New Perspective

animals.nationalgeographic.com

animals.nationalgeographic.com

Life is challenging at times.  If we aren’t careful we can find ourselves feeling cornered, over whelmed, tired, and stressed.  Things happen, unexpected events, circumstances change in moments.

Life is merciless and can come at a rapid pace that leaves us breathless and feeling helpless.  The thing to remember at such times is, this too shall pass.  It’s a cliché, but it’s still true.  Moments both good and bad only last for moments.

Sometimes all it takes to change a situation is to change your perspective.  My art teacher taught me long ago, when getting frustrated while working on a portrait a long time, sometimes you get too close to the subject and the picture can start to look off.  The best thing to do is put the picture up awhile, go do something else, then come back to it later.  When you take it out later, turn it upside down and you will immediately see any flaws in the portrait.

There are a lot of things that work the same way.  When you work on something a long while, your stress level and emotional involvement can skew your perspective.  It’s important to work with a partner, or have trusted friends who will tell you when something is off, or perhaps help you take a break and see things differently.

Finances, for instance, can weigh heavily on the mind, cause lack of sleep, stomach aches, and stress that affects the body and mind.  Still, we have the option to ask for help, seek guidance, and the ability to look up possible solutions literally at our fingertips.

Jim Rohn said, “Everything you need is already available to you.”  I had to think about that awhile, because I tell you, it didn’t feel like everything I needed was available earlier this year.  Yet, after reading books, studying classes, searching for resources and taking advantage of just part of the things I have access too and have available to me, I realize Jim Rohn is right.

Don’t allow yourself to feel cornered or down.  You have a choice, you are in control of your attitude and the emotions you choose to use at any given moment.  If what you’re doing each day doesn’t leave you feeling fulfilled, or like your accomplishing something, happy, or content, then take a look at what’s going on in your life and how you’re responding.  Perhaps you need a break, a change in perspective.

Cherry Coley ©